Warm weather doe not make non-alcoholics

As soon as the weather in Canberra brings a (natural) flush to a girls face, you know its drinking season.

Canberra is a stunning but ferociously-cold-in-the-winter-city so when the weather warms, the un students come out, from hibernating like bears, to drinking Red Bear.

Armed with towels, shorts and a large collection of Havana thongs, as well as the all important grog to boot, the patio’s turn into party platforms and houses, basic bars.

For all of you who can relate, sure it sounds idyllic, getting drunk in the warmer weather and yes, on those terms it is but what about the uni students trying to get to class who have to do the triple jump of hopping, skipping and jumping to avoid shards of glass?

And how about the scenery guys? Rolling hills, a gorgeous sunset, a used condom and a random passed out before 8 o clock.

It does happen.

Now I doubt this is an every night thing, but 3 out 4 times it happens more than twice a week in the warmer months, and don’t even get me started when O week rolls around.

I see the link between warm weather and booze clearly, it’s a cool drink that boosts the confidence, that makes everything seem fun (something that I reject) and above all, you can go out without concern of frostbite in those open toe heels.

However, the warmer weather also means the girls will dress more like prostitutes, making it easier for the booze-hounds to slap tickle and ride the pussies of all these lasses.

Warmer weather does not make non-alcoholics; rather it brings out the Adonis in all of us, the one part of our persona to be stressed about how we look, what we drink and how we look drinking.

So warmer weather makes us more vain, not sober., and just because we are old enough to drink ourselves to a beer belly, bad skin or to oblivion the next day, does not mean that we should.

Tune into tomorrow’s article about the connection between the Individual, the shot and the forgotten lores of drinking.